Caden was holding his composure admirably in the face of such a difficult discussion; yet again Tanya felt a surge of pride for the jack she had played some small part in raising, along with a healthy dose of respect. Painful though his road had no doubt been, it had led him to a place of emotional intelligence few in Bully Harbour possessed.

It was evident that his words had touched her, and green eyes briefly darted before the prickling dampness in the corners began to show. Tanya chuckled but the humour did not reach her eyes. "That means a lot, Caden. Thanky'. Still, whatever it tells you, you'd be best taking it with a pinch of doubt," she replied. "I ain't often a good sort and I don't say that out've a need to be told otherwise. I've done wrong by plenty who deserve to stay angry: I don't deserve forgiveness so I won't ask you for it. But I'd be remiss to suggest I ain't trying to make amends where I can. Now I've done things in my life...terrible things I can't talk about, but what happened with your parents is one of my biggest regrets. Often I've wondered how I'd have done things differently with an older head on these shoulders."

The older fox settled back in her chair with a long sigh. "That's the problem with looking back. In the end your mother gave me the best gift I could ask for: the opportunity to raise my kits. In the end the twins ended up seeing Falun cut down on the docks, and there's nothing I could ever do to heal that wound. Still, they had their mum, and that's more'n can be said for you. When she was my Cap'n I always knew she was the one I could trust to look after her crew. Even in her grief she saw fit to put others first. That's down to Skeenie's character."

Her gaze dipped briefly to where the two beasts' paws were intertwined, expression softening on another moment of reflection. "Now I can't say I know you either, but my impression is you two are some of the best've us. You don't have to trust or forgive me, but if you'd let me, I'd be delighted to get to know you better over time." She looked to Daniil. "Both of you. Even if this is prob'ly one of the worst ways we could be introduced, eh?"
 
Daniil listened to the vixen's confessions, surprise showing on his face at the apology she offered and humility demonstrated. Tanya seemed entirely unlike her sister; if Daniil had ever heard his Aunt Dusk once truly express contrition or regret, he couldn't think of it. He was fairly certain the Hellgates themselves would open if she even tried.

That isn't very kind, Mileya's voice, which had become his conscience over the years, rebuked him. He had to admit, the characterization was a bit harsh. Aunt Dusk loved to put on a front of being braver, smarter, and more powerful than she was; while it was hard to get to the real her past the facade she wore like armor, he'd seen it happen from time to time. Mileya and his cousin Alywn, in particular, seemed to be able to draw out the gentler side of the vixen from time to time. While it was far from the sustained humbleness that Tanya now demonstrated, it at least was still a positive change.

Daniil smiled at Tanya's remark. "I can think of worse, y- Tanya," he corrected himself. He gave Caden's paw a small squeeze as he glanced over at his lover. "The first time we ever met, I think I scared Caden with my blade," he recalled. He gripped the katana by the hilt, a motion of seeking comfort. "It belonged to my mother," he explained. "I'm not sure that Caden had ever seen a katana before that, right?" He glanced to Caden in curiosity.
 
"Not since I was a kit," Caden said weakly, fumbling for a reasonable explanation for his reaction from that day some months before. Daniil had never mentioned it, and the jack hoped it would have been forgotten in all that had happened since. "I remember Falun more faintly, but it was Talinn who I knew better, as I met him when I was older, and I remember his katana. He and my mother were frequently...at odds. Seeing such a blade after so many years brought back memories from that time in my life, some of which are more difficult to face."

It was not entirely a lie; there was a great deal of truth in his statement. He simply skirted around his issue with that specific katana worn by Daniil. He pressed on in hopes that his explanation would be accepted. It seemed Daniil took everything he said with the innocence and earnestness of a trusting kit, but he knew enough about Tanya to know that she could find even the smallest of leaks in what seemed a well-sealed story.

"First impressions are certainly important, but even more important is what we do with our time together after a first meeting." Caden inclined his head slightly to the vixen. "I'd be interested in getting to know you as well, Tanya. Though, I may not have much choice otherwise, given that I've found myself pulled into the Ryalor fold." He smiled fondly at Daniil before turning back to Tanya. "I don't know anybeast who served under my mother when she was a Naval captain. She spoke fondly of those days, though, and of the beasts she sailed with. Seems it was a happier, simpler time for her. I remember wishing I had been born to her then, rather than later in her life."

He shook his head and shrugged. "So perhaps you can help me get to know her better, the full extent of her. My memories and feelings about her are...complicated, to say the least. Seems most of that time of my life was complicated; probably why I got out of the Imperium and ran from it as soon as I could. I understand having regrets and the need to make amends. Gates know I made my fair share of choices and mistakes that cost innocent lives over the course of my life." His gaze had become distant and hard as he looked away towards the plant on his desk. He paused for several long moments. Finally, he looked back to the vixen, a haunted expression flitting behind his red eyes.

"So I can't fault you, Tanya, not really. I'd be willing to learn how to trust you, over time. Seems we all need more beasts we can trust."
 
Tanya masked any visible reaction to the thought of Vaelora wielding a katana of all things, and elected to keep the presence of the Dark Judge Brushes safe where they remained beneath her jacket. Perhaps they carried some memories of their own for Daniil she could discuss later; perhaps her niece had already jettisoned that part of herself when she took up her original name once more. There and now, she wasn’t sure how she would take the potential of that reality.

Her focus lingered on Caden for a moment but anything she made of his hasty response she did not voice. So keen was she to make a decent impression that she did not think it worth the query.

“My condolences for bein’ dragged in with the Ryalors,” Tanya joked, hoping there was enough levity in her voice to avoid offending Daniil whilst expressing her own opinion. “There’s always something happening or other in the family. You two feel free to come to me if things get messy an’ I’ll pull a few tails. Who knows, maybe if I’m royalty they’ll have to listen for once.” Her expression softened, though the mischief remained in her eyes. “Still, the things we do for love, eh? I’m certain it’s all worth it, though you might have to ask my husband what his thoughts are on that now he’s having to settle into it himself.”

Green eyes settled back on Caden. Her heart ached, feeling utterly unworthy of a forgiveness she could never extend to herself and a rush of admiration for his strength. Were she in his place she wasn’t so certain it would be the same. Where parents were involved…it was complicated for Tox. Still even if she would take this regret to her grave, it gave her some comfort to know that this jack might still find peace for himself. Again something prickled her hackles at the look in his eyes, but it was far, far too early to risk prying.

“I appreciate that, Caden. Trust is prob’ly the only commodity left in this city beasts can’t grab at just by force. We’ll take it slow, but I’d be more’n happy to chat about those times best as I remember. Your ma and me served under my brother when he was Cap’n, and all,” she let a smirk return to her muzzle. “Reckon I’ve got a few fun stories about some adventures we got up to less befittin’ a Captain from back then.” Her gaze turned to Daniil, “How’s this one for that? He always well-behaved or got a bit of trouble in ‘im?”
 
Caden raised his brows at Daniil in a playful expression. "Well, he fell in with me, so he's bound to have some inclinations towards trouble. I'm working on teasing it out of him, aye, Daniil?"
 
Daniil blushed a bit at Caden's teasing and Tanya's examination, but managed to hold his own. "I tend to be better at attracting trouble to me than seeking it out myself," he admitted. "After all, that's how I drew in this one." It was a sign of how safe he felt that he gave his partner a kiss on the cheek in front of Tanya.
 
Caden returned the kiss with a gentle nudge against Daniil's shoulder and an affectionate smile. He returned his attention to Tanya. A question dwelt in his mind, one which he knew from his own experience would perhaps open up a larger story.

"What brought you back?" he asked Tanya. "That we both returned to the Imperium within the same month of each other is either coincidence or a very interesting twist the Fates have thrown at us."
 
The affection between them was clear, and sweet though such open love was, there lingered a sadness in Tanya’s smile. Times might have changed according to Dusk, but the ever-paranoid vixen wasn’t entirely certain it had enough to look upon an interspecies relationship quite so fondly. She wondered what the Ryalor house would make of it, if they even yet knew. It was not a secret of hers to tell.

Brows raised in gentle amusement, turning to a contemplative frown. “Well now, it’d be a lie to say there wasn’t always something calling me back,” she admitted. “This city raised me an’ one way or another it has a funny way of dragging back those who escape ‘er clutches. I’m sure you’re well aware of that, Caden. That being said, I was takin’ advantage of an adventure already in the works. My two youngest, Kinza and Lorcan, have been wanting to get off of Kutoroka for some time and see more’n trees and sand for years. Now it ain’t my intention to be running about after the pair’ve ‘em – in fact I haven’t seen either aside from knowing they arrived here safely – but if you want to get to know more family, Daniil, by my reckoning that makes you second cousins once removed. I think.” She scratched her muzzle. “Not sure the finest minds’d manage to untangle the mess of this family, heh.

“Anyway, you’d recognise Kinza well enough, she looks enough like me an’ your aunt when we was younger. Am certain they’d be happy to see you and your siblings, some time.” Her eyes moved to the marten. “The twins spoke of you Caden – like as not they’d be keen to put a face to the name some time.”
 
Daniil's eyes widened at mention of distant cousins - siblings, he presumed, to the missing heirs to the Fyadorian throne. Given how disinterested Tanya seemed to be in said throne, however, Daniil opted to still his tongue and let that observation pass. He couldn't quite resist the urge to speak up, though, when the twins were brought up directly. "Where are the royal twins now?" he inquired. "I'm certain that Alywn - my cousin, and theirs - would be thrilled to meet them." He hesitated before adding, "Technically I am not a Ryalor by blood, so I am uncertain if I would be worthy of claiming them as cousins myself."
 
Caden added the names of Tanya's youngest to his growing knowledge of her family. She was right, the thing was quite the tangled mess. It was not often he was grateful for the simplicity of his familial ties--those ties being mostly non-existent unless he decided to announce himself to the Freemont line, and even then, it was hard to conceive of any family having as convoluted a family tree as the Ryalors. Though, he had to admit, some of the Varangian nobility and royalty he had encountered would have given them a run for their money.

He waited with interest as Daniil asked the question he had been waiting to ask as well. Given the opportunity, he would not mind meeting the twins in adulthood now. Though their lives had only briefly overlapped at such a young age, the faint memories Caden did have of them were fond, and he felt a sort of kinship, even if it was fleeting.

"Count me in on meeting them if the opportunity arises," Caden added. "It would be interesting to compare stories of where our lives went after our time together."
 
Though she smiled to speak of her children, there came an ever so slight flicker of concern, one which had long sat when it came to discussing their return to the Imperium. She would never have put her paw down to stop them should they have ever showed an interest, though she had been grateful that they had not. After conversations with Dusk she could only have surmised it a wiser course of action. As much as she worried about her youngest two, their separation from the Ryalor house was no small matter.

"Mm, I wager the lot of you have had quite the exciting time," she conceded, giving Caden a smirk. "Don't think any of you lot can stay out of trouble for long. Now Daniil, blood don't matter if the family wants you and I'm certain they would. 'Owever I don't foresee them heading to these shores for quite some time. Neither really feels much attachment considerin' it's where they saw their dad die." A sympathetic glance flicked between both fox and marten. "I'm certain you know what I mean. They'd rather not revisit a place which means little else but pain; there was no vengeance for them. They've both got the hearts of explorers now, so they've been off for seasons now 'Gates only knows where and I'm certain I'm happier in my ignorance else I'd be going pure wh-... gr--" She pulled a wry expression. "Youse two know how to make an old vixen feel at home with her looks, eh?

"Now they aren't Ryalor by blood themselves, but Kinza and Lorcan could always do with some family. I won't ask a favour of you, but if either of you happen to see 'em in any trouble I'd always appreciate lending them a paw. They're old enough to handle themselves, but the Imperium's a far cry from the way they've been brought up. I'd trust either of them in a scrap or out on the ocean but politics is a whole other world."
 
Daniil looked thoughtful as Tanya explained the twins' rationale for not returning to the Imperium, and he looked to Caden sympathetically, taking his paw. Coming back to the city where his mother had been murdered had been arduous for him, just as he was sure it had been for Caden; he could certainly understand why the foxes would choose to stay away. The corner of his mouth couldn't help but twitch as Tanya struggled with her metaphors; he'd sometimes wondered if his mother would have made jokes out of her snowy fur color had she lived long enough to reach an age where her kits would get it. He could almost imagine her voice: "You kits, it is good my fur is already vhite, ozzervise I vould look like a ghost right now." "You know, eweryvone ask how my fur gets so vhite. I tell zem, 'Raise zhree kits'. Zey say 'no is so hard'. I say 'you no hawe met my kits'."

A melancholy briefly crossed his face at the imagined jests, because he knew that, while he could imagine a playful side to his mother, a wit to her that would be devastatingly funny to her friends and merely devastating to her enemies, she'd never once turned it against her own kits, even when they'd vexed her. She'd been patient with them when they taxed her, kind when they were upset, and generous when they weren't feeling very grateful. Never once had she ever given them reason to doubt that she loved them.

"Maybe someday I'll marry him," she'd remarked of Mister Bridger, speaking to Daniil in confidence when he'd fretted that she would marry the Todd and no longer have time for him or his siblings, "but first I'd hawe to know zat he loves you zhree as much as I do, and zat is is wery hard to do. You know vhy?" She'd nuzzled him affectionately as she told him, "Because I don't zink anyvone in ze vorld can love somevone like I love you."

Oh, Mum.


Daniil didn't realize he'd started to cry until he felt the wetness on his cheeks. He hurried to daub at them with his paw, apologizing to the others in the room. "I'm so sorry, it has nothing to do with you, I swear." He sniffled, feeling his eyes getting puffy already, his sinuses irritated like he had a cold. "You were saying... Your other kits? They're here too? Where are they?"
 
When Daniil looked to him, Caden did his best to make eye contact and give a small nod before turning back to Tanya. He could certainly empathize with the choice to remain away from the Imperium, and in some ways he was envious of the twins. He would not have returned if circumstances had not forced his paw. Even then, sometimes he questioned his decision. Though, paw in paw with Daniil, and being faced with the potential for reconciliation of much of his past mistakes in the Imperium, it felt as though fate had brought him back to this place of old hurts for a reason--or many reasons.

He glanced at Daniil again. Seeing his partner crying, the marten felt himself shrinking in fear while also wanting to do anything he possibly could to comfort the todd. Caden shifted his chair closer so he could put an arm about Daniil's shoulders and gently pull the fox into him.
 
It caught the older vixen off guard to see Daniil moved to tears, and at once Tanya was reeling back through her words to see if she could idenfity what had triggered such a reaction in the todd. Though he had hastened to reassure her, concern was still evident upon her face. Oh, 'Gates, he doesn't deserve to be in the middle of a city like this.

"Aye, they should be plannin' to join up with the Hide or similar, last I heard of their plans," Tanya replied slowly, "though you know how those go. Kinza's a dab paw as a seamstress so I wager she'll be around the markets picking up supplies. You might even hear 'er before you see her: got a beautiful singing voice, she has." Pride was evident in her tone, though it softened once again. "Are you certain you're alright, Daniil?"
 
Daniil leaned into Caden's embrace, letting his tears drop onto the marten's coat. He sniffled a bit, rubbing at his nose with the back of his paw before addressing Tanya's concerned inquiry. "I'm fine," he mumbled. "Just... Something you said reminded me of my mum - Vaelora," he clarified. "I'm sorry, it's been a while since I've cried over her. Most days I can handle it, and then missing her just ambushes me." There was a touch of embarrassment in his eyes at losing control over his composure.
 
The stiffening of Caden's shoulders and sudden shift in his breathing pattern that he took several moments to revert back to normal were likely imperceptible to most beasts interacting with him, but anybeast with an eye for that sort of thing would note that the change in the jack's being came about at the mention of Vaelora. He rubbed Daniil's shoulder, as much for his own comfort as the todd's.

"You don't have to apologize. I understand, and I'm sure Tanya does, too. No matter how long a beast has been gone, sometimes that grief can come up and hit us when we least expect it." Giving Daniil an encouraging kiss on the cheek, Caden continued, "I've certainly cried about my mum since coming back to the Imperium. There's a lot of reminders here. So you're in good company."
 
She had hardly needed any further convincing considering the impression they had given her, but Caden’s immediate support for Daniil, and that Daniil had felt safe enough to explain himself, spoke volumes of their relationship. Quite suddenly she was gripped again with a fierce protective urge over the couples’ safety, and had to remind herself that these were adults. The vixen had noted the most subtle of shifts in the jack at the mention of Vaelora, but considering her own reaction to the name Tanya did not as yet pay it any mind other than recognition.

Her heart went out to Daniil, though she knew that she would need to tread lightly. Considering the re-naming of the white vixen she did not yet know if her adopted children had even known her as Armina. Quite unlikely by the sounds.

“Now I’m an old codger an’ have a reputation for being a hard-nosed pain in the tail so don’t you go tellin’ a soul,” she warned, “but Caden’s right and there’s days sometimes I don’t get me brush out of bed for the pain. Grief’s like the tide and sometimes we hit a riptide: there’s nothing we can do but to feel it else we drown. Trust me, far better you shed your tears than hold ‘em in.” She gave Caden a nod. “This city’s stuffed with memories. Much as it’s changed, there’s enough stays the same that every street has a ghost or two. There’s no shame in missin’ your mums. I miss ‘em, too.”
 
Daniil nodded, blinking away tears as Tanya shared in their grief. He furrowed his brow in a moment of quizzicality. "So, wait - you did meet Mum?" he inquired, confusion clear in his voice. "I thought she was living in Eastisle before she came over here in... '32? '33? Somewhere in there."
 
With a great deal of difficulty, Caden kept his expression level and his body still. He did not know how the Ryalors had kept the identity of Vaelora secret from not only her children, but many others. It pained him whenever Daniil's ignorance came to the forefront, knowing the fox had lived thirty years with an impression of the beast who adopted him that was only part of who she was. It was not that he faulted the todd for the rosy lens through which he viewed Vaelora, but it was the knowledge that, at some point, he would learn the full story of Armina. Caden was not sure his partner would be the same once he knew, as pure and good was his depiction of his mother--and how much inspiration he took from the part of her story he knew.

He tried to appear less keenly interested than he was as he looked to Tanya for her answer, his heart beginning to race. There in that moment he was on a razor's edge of anxiety, unsure which way the vixen would answer, the insecurity of the potentials that could arise sending his tail to twitching in anticipation.
 
Though her heart sank to know that Daniil had been told so little and so much of Armina had been erased Tanya was quick to consider her options. It did her conscience little good to lie to the todd for it would only be a matter of time, but she resolved that this was neither the time nor place. Vaelora’s secrets were her own and a conscious choice had been made to protect Daniil and his siblings: Tanya was in no rush to disassemble that in a single stroke.

Not yet, at least.

“‘Course I spent time with her,” the vixen replied smoothly, though she rather suspected she was going to need to spend some hours in the libraries of the city trying to piece together history and culture quite rapidly. “I spent a fair bit of time over that way in my younger days sailin’, though that was long seasons past now. ‘Twas easier to call me her aunt, the way we got on.”
 
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