Caden pushed his back against the alley wall and looked up between the buildings into the darkening sky. Stars had begun to appear, just visible through the thin, low clouds billowing in off the ocean. His body felt loose and free, the constant buzz of anxiety that usually plagued him completely gone. This is why he had to be careful with alcohol, he knew. It made life too effortless for a few hours. Emotions he normally kept well locked away flowed readily, and suddenly they did not seem so dangerous. His secrets and fears, dreams and hopes, all existed at the forefront of his consciousness, free for him to let out into the world. He wasn't looking forward to the come down.
"Why not invite Daniil, indeed?" He shoved off the wall and began pacing in front of Eirene, not in a particularly straight or steady line, but he managed to keep from tripping each time he turned. "Thirty years ago, Eirene. It was another lifetime. But coming back here, it's bled into this new life. Why can't anything be simple? Why him?"
Suddenly he pivoted and stopped directly in front of her, placing his paws on her shoulders. His words came out rapidly. "You can't tell Daniil, or anybeast else for that matter. Several of the Ryalors know, but they've kept it from him. Alwyn all but ordered me to hold my tongue, said the information would devastate Daniil. Which, I'm inclined to agree with him, now that I've spent some time with Daniil and heard how his mother's death impacted his life." Releasing her shoulders, he turned from her and paced away several steps before stopping again and staring upwards at the sky.
"Anithias used me. I was scared, so scared. My mother was dead, and I was so easy to manipulate. I wanted to do anything to cover up that fear, and anger was the easiest thing to turn to. I was eight and had already seen so much more violence and death than most beasts three times my age. Anithias fed me lies about my mother's death, about who was responsible. He armed me with the knife Daniil now carries."
Caden's shoulders slumped and he faced Eirene once more. "I killed Vaelora. In the chaos of that night I slipped in and assassinated her, leaving the knife sunk into her body. I was supposed to take out Daniil and his siblings, too, but I had to get out before I was caught. Thank 'Gates I didn't succeed in that." Tears had begun flowing uninhibited down his cheeks. "So what am I supposed to do with all this? Invite Daniil to a dinner party and keep the facade going? I like him, Eirene. How many other available males are there in Bully Harbor and somehow we find each other and I start falling for him? What are the chances of that?"
