Private Barracks/Imperial Condos The Trenches The Canon

[Asta Dalgaard]

Asta looked over her shoulder in concern at the change in Whisper's tone. Seeing her friend with tears running down their face, the jill felt a pang of concern. She glanced at Caden, noting that the fox's demeanor had changed significantly when he entered. For his part, the jack seemed about to say something, and Asta could see that he would attempt to reassure the little vulpine. Asta's intuition, borne of her own experience with fear and trauma, was enough to cause her to interject.

"Caden, would you mind putting on some tea for us?" she asked, giving him a pointed look as she tilted her head towards Whisper. Caden was quick to catch her intent. He ducked back into the hallway with a quick nod.

"Tea sounds wonderful. Of course."

Once his footpawsteps had receded down the hall, Asta turned back to Whisper and reached out to take their paw. "Whisper, is everything okay? You're safe here, I promise."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whsiper gave a meek smile through tears as their paw was taken. Caden's presence or lack of it mattered little now that they already went through the tipping point. They just really lost any care, fully accepting the hopelessness just like at the Opera.

"No... b-b-but it d-doesn't ma-matter. I-I a-al-already f-f-failed. I m-must se-se-seem like a d-disaster t-to your f-f-father and t-to you. I am ju-just t-t-trying to enjoy t-t-this while i-i-it-it lasts, b-be-because I-I k-know neither of you wi-will want t-to s-see me e-e-ever again. No one w-would."

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Whisper, you don't seem like a disaster at all." Asta held their paw gently, trying to think of how to reassure the fox. "Why would I not want to seeing you again? Because you're having a hard time? I have a hard time a lot, too. Not meaning that nobeast wants to see you and be with you."

She rubbed the back of her neck, glancing at the portrait of her father. "If it helping to hear, I get scared with some things, too. I'm afraid of male beasts I don't know and feel frozen and very very scared when they are around. On the ship from Varangia, with all the sailors, it taking me weeks to even talk to them without Caden. One of them was very nice and liking me, but I was so scared I would run away from him and cry in my cabin when he would try talking to me." Asta did not bother to hide her own tears as the recollections of what had happened to her came to the forefront of her mind. "I thinking it is okay to be scared when you having reasons, when beasts say or do things to you that hurting you. It making every day after that harder."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper listened carefully yet felt only more and more empty. Here was a beast that had actual reason to be sad. One that lost a father, was traumatised by some other beast and Whisper had some unfortunate ideas on how that could've happened that they wouldn't want to consider normally. All in all, Asta said it the best. It was okay to be scared when one had reasons, when being hurt.

Whisper did not. And since they were already knowing it didn't matter, or maybe because they needed to drop it off, they just spoke. With sad tone, but much more drive than usual.

"Y-you at least h-have a valid r-r-reason to be afraid... I just w-was born t-this way. Weak, s-sickly... I was non-verbal t-till I was s-six. I needed c-constant a-attention and m-medicine... who w-would w-want or love a k-kit like that?! I w-was s-stuck at home, not even a-able to p-play with my s-siblings who were a-afraid of h-hurting me a-all the t-time. I ended up s-spending countless h-hours by the piano as th-that was the o-only thing I c-could actually d-do that wasn't u-useless. I h-hoped that maybe w-with time I will g-get better. Instead I am s-stuck in the body of a t-twelve year old k-kit. Still weak, p-picked on and only approached out of p-pity. I have only my m-music to offer to the w-world. But I h-have f-failed at everything e-else al-already by d-d-default. I will never h-have k-kits, pretty s-sure it would k-kill me. I n-never went through pu-puberty, and n-never had fr-friends outside of my f-family. One that c-cared! But I am sure they ju-just wanted a normal daughter... not a p-problem child I am."

And that exhausted Whisper. They collapsed onto Asta in soundless sobbing again.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Oh, Whisper, I'm so sorry." Asta held them, wrapping her arms about the small fox. She stayed like that for a time, not saying anything, simply trying to be a solid, friendly presence as Whisper cried into her. Finally she found words that she hoped would be meaningful to them.

"You having a lot of reasons to be afraid it sounding like. Beasts treating you different, not loving you the same way they would other beasts. You being born how you are is not your fault, and beasts treating you like you are less, picking on you, that is just reason to be afraid like somebeast hurting your body." She ran a paw up and down Whisper's back in gentle strokes. "If it helping to hear, I don't pity you. I like you, Whisper. I thinking you nice, and um, pretty, too."

The jill blushed, realizing what she had said without fully thinking. She could not backtrack it now, as that would only hurt the fox more, but with her honesty out there, she suddenly felt quite vulnerable.

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper died.

Mentally at least. They were already dead inside from accepting that there is no hope for them anymore in this scenario. But now...

Hearing that somebeast, anybeast would not pity them was a lot. Hearing they are being liked was honestly a fantasy. Hearing they were pretty was universe-collapsing to the little fox.

Sure they heard it before, from family mostly and from creepy beasts. They fully disagreed and knew that considering them pretty was basically considering a kit pretty. Not something that should be said.

But... Asta didn't mean it. They weren't creepy. There wasn't anything that sheltered Whisper would find odd. Honest words and honest reaction that the Jill had were impossible to believe, the fox wanted to not believe her.

And yet, they couldn't. Asta was an honest beast, Whisper already gathered so. To them it was what scary however, unknown, worrying even.

After all, a beast that was never loved in the way they deserved knew only fear.

And after a prolonged paralysis, Whisper lifted their head and looked at Asta with big, glassy, emerald eyes.

"H-how..?" Was the only word they could utter.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

It was not the reaction nor question Asta expected. Her experience with such things thus far in her life had been rather limited, and Whisper was quite different than anybeast she had encountered. Asta wanted them to feel safe and loved, as it was apparent nobeast had ever provided that for them. She just fumbled for the words to do so in Vulpinsulan, as it felt like every word she knew had flown from her mind.

"I...well...it is like, you looking young, but I knowing that you are my age, maybe older? So I just seeing you as you, and you are, um....what is word, special?" Asta felt her own fear rising as she worried she was going to offend the fox and drive them further away. "Your music is very nice and I liking that. To me, you feeling safe and interesting." She looked away shyly. "Sorry if that is too much."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Special.

That was the word that Whisper had heard a lot. Usually however it was either done in mockery or to 'explain' their behaviour or state.

Safe.

Only their younger siblings found them such. To their parents and most older family members they were more of a hassle than anything, no matter their kind words.

Interesting.

That one was new. Whisper could debunk the other two words, even if they were said with that painful honesty that Asta had. This one? There was nothing they could do about it. Interesting wasn't always positive, but it was new.

How could a beast react to this? To being told things for the first time? That they were pretty, interesting, special, safe. It was all too much for Whisper but...

It was in a good way.

Whisper stopped sobbing, they basically melted into Asta's embrace. They allowed themselves to feel it really. To feel what Asta told them.

"Don't a-apologise... Th-thank you Asta." They whispered. "I w-want to be s-safe with you..."

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Oh, um." For a moment Asta did not know what to do. She had never had a beast melt into her in such a way. It felt good, though part of her fluttered with some unspoken terror that could have also been excitement, but she could not currently discern between the two emotions. Recalling how she had seen Caden and her father embrace, or Caden and Daniil, the jill let herself gently fall back against the pillows, holding Whisper close and trying to relax. "I wanting to be somebeast you feeling safe with, too."

There was movement in the doorway, and Asta saw Caden slowly peering around the doorframe, tea pot in paw.

"Ah, er, I suppose I will just--" he lifted the teapot and titled his head back down the hallway, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he looked at his daughter and her friend holding each other in the bed. "Take this into the lounge whenever you're ready for it?"

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Asta's presence today was nothing but cathartic for Whisper. Being accepted at first, earlier at their home. Now also being shown honest care, praise. The Jill proved to Whisper something that Whisper didn't believe. That they can be of value beyond just their music to anybeast. That is why there was absolutely no protest as Asta leaned back. Instead Whisper quietly hummed the music again, continuing the song Asta shown her earlier, while nuzzling into her with whole body. It felt right and Whisper for once didn't feel in any way wrong about it.

Even Caden who just came by and observed the scene didn't change that. Whisper just noted his words. They held no venom and that was enough for the fox. Turning slightly around to face Asta again, Whisper truly spoke. Their voice was melodic and intertwined with the music she still hummed. "Shall we leave, or should we stay..? It's your choice for I'm okay~"

This was a rare quality that very few beasts could even know about Whisper. When they were really okay, they didn't speak. They could only sing.