Private Barracks/Imperial Condos The Trenches The Canon

[Asta Dalgaard]

Asta was, perhaps unfortunately, no stranger to sudden bouts of crying and being held by a trusted beast. And so when Whisper held her, sobbing into her, she did what she knew always helped her in such circumstances. The jill wrapped her arms about the small fox and rocked slowly back and forth, trying to instill as much care and comfort into the gesture as she could.

"Pathetic?" She was confused. "I not understanding, Whisper. There being nothing wrong with your body. It is your body, ja? That meaning it is good, because it is you, and you are good."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper was too far into their desperation to think straight, instinct was the only thing keeping them acting as they melted into jill's arms like a kit. Her insecurities of course screamed at that even more as she just was proving that indeed, she was a child she hated. There was no end to this pit for now as Whisper was crashing deeper and deeper into the void.

"You c-c-cannot m-m-mean i-it. I s-sh-shouldn't b-b-be alive! O-on-only r-reason why I-I-I am is be-because my p-p-parents took p-pity o-on me! What for?! I h-h-have useless b-b-body. Skills n-no beast w-wants. I c-cannot ta-talk. I c-c-cannot have f-fr-riends. I f-fail even a-at keeping m-m-myself fed!" The crash was hard and it was only getting worse and worse. Whisper instinctively burrowed further into Asta, the Jill unfortunately being chosen to withstand them.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Whisper, I meaning it completely." Asta desperately searched for words in her not-quite-fluent Vulpinsulan. This would be so much easier could she simply speak her native tongue. "Your body not being useless. Your skills--you are very talented musician, and there are beasts who liking that a lot. You having friends, ja? I'm here, and I calling you friend."

She ran a paw up and down the fox's damp back. "For food, we can doing that together. You just needing to get dry and putting on clothes, then we going out and getting you food." Trying to think of something that might pull Whisper from their difficulties, Asta returned to the reason why she had arrived at the fox's doorstep in the first place that morning. "Anyway, I having something important I wanting to ask you. It is something you can do for my father maybe, something I hearing about from Niceties that you are doing."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper had to take a long moment to process Asta's words. Mainly because they could not believe them at all. Them? Being a friend? That jill must've jested. Taking either pity or mocking them. And yet...

Whisper for all their social flaws had a good ability to read others. They rarely did so, afraid of learning that beasts hated them, so they chose to live in the mist despite it, only actually letting themselves look into that when it was truly safe.

They did look at Asta again through glassy eyes and clouded mind. Yet still, jill's muzzle spoke of compassion. Honesty. It emphasised how genuine her thoughts and words were.

It scared Whisper, for they had no idea how to react to this. How to react to someone liking them. Someone wanting their help.

But it did take them out of the abyss. Soon they stopped sobbing and let go of Asta. Even attempting (and failing) a tiny little smile.

"I... see. P-please, help m-me then. I wi-will do what I c-can for your f-father. C-could you... b-bring my d-dr-dress from a drawer b-by the bed? I w-will dry myself and t-then we c-can go and talk a-ab-bout it."

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

Carefully extricating herself from beneath Whisper, Asta clambered up. Her dress was soaked now, but she gave the vixen a smile and nod. "I will be happy getting it for you."

The marteness went to the bedroom, stepping around various items to get to the dresser, and withdrew the indicated garment. Though she was worried perhaps she had unintentionally crossed certain boundaries with the fox, Asta hoped things would not be awkward between them--or more awkward than they already were. She found she had a hard time knowing the right thing to say to the fox, never knowing when they might break down.

She returned to Whisper with the dress. "It is a very nice dress," she offered, holding the garment out.

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper was now getting themselves ready, shaking off excess water and using towels to remove as much dampness as possible. Asta came in the process of doing so but Whisper didn't bother to cover themselves. Asta already seen their disfigured body and shown acceptance for it. It was a huge step for Whisper, one that almost made them fall from sheer fear and anxiety, but one they found important. It was a test for themselves more than anything.

When given the dress, Whisper put it on deftly. They were used to wearing both feminine and masculine clothing but today they decided a dress will do them nicely. Asta's words were kind and they further shown that she didn't really judge or at least was playing amazingly well. "T-Thank you." They said shyly. "I l-like to w-wear it to f-feel mo-more like a g-girl I sh-should be."

Once ready, Whisper just padded along Asta, now really ready to take on the day. "L-lead the w-way... please."

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

Picking up her satchel by the door, Asta shouldered it and smiled at Whisper. "I not knowing about what you 'should' be. You're Whisper, and being you is good, I think. I wouldn't want you being anybeast else."

She led the way out the door into the late morning. Glancing down at her wet dress, the jill shivered slightly. The morning was a cloudy one, with a slight chill to the air. "Would you being okay if we went to my house so I can get something dry to wear? I living in the Imperial Condos area." She brightened. "Oh! I having good bread there we could eat, too. I made it this morning."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper nodded shyly. "S-sure, I wi-will c-come with you." They still struggled with accepting the fact they were accepted unconditionally. In fact, the mention of being taken to Asta's home made the little fox imagine the most vile of scenarios that would validate all mothers in whole Imperium who tell their kits to not follow strangers.

Asta however, wasn't a stranger. Whisper deeply craved some connection deep within, even abusive one as events in the Opera show, though fortunately it was a misunderstanding on their part. As such they followed Asta, no matter what the fate held for them. There was another issue however here. Whisper... disliked silence.

"Do... do you m-make b-b-bread as a hob-b-by?" They asked a bit awkwardly as they walked along, making themselves as little and scarce as possible.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"As a hobby?" Asta shook her head. "No, I making it because there is not much good bread in this city. The food here is...ah...kjedelig og smakløst...boring I guess I would say? Growing up on the farm in Varangia, we always having good bread, vegetables, fruit, fish and meats. There is less to be choosing from here, and it is not so fresh. So I grow and make much of it myself."

She brightened, her steps taking on a bouncing quality in excitement for several moments. "Oh! I can show you my garden. I having a lot of vegetables and flowers. Since you having a plant book, I thinking you like plants, ja?"

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper was impressed by the dedication Asta put into simple matters as food. To them, it wasn't a thing they often had in mind as they, as Asta could see, weren't the best with managing themselves. Idea putting extra effort to such matters as quality of bread was really but a dream to a fox that had to put effort into as simple things as existing.

But in general, Asta wasn't as emotional as Whisper. So when the little fox saw how excited the Jill could get over the prospect of talking about plants, Whisper flustered as they knew already they once more had to prove their uselessness. "I'm s-sorry... I-I just... I d-doubt I am a-any close t-to being as k-kno-knowledgeable as y-you are. I ju-just like flowers b-because they are p-pretty and d-de-delicate Like I wanted to be. I d-did a-always enjoyed ma-making b-bouquets and d-de-decorations from t-them."

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Oh that's wonderful." Asta clapped her paws together. "I liking flowers, too, though I don't think I am so good at decorating. That is nice that you liking to make bouquets. Maybe you could teach me."

This reminded her of her original intent for her visit once more. Her mind was a flurry of thoughts, even moreso than her usual stream of consciousness, though she could not understand why. She felt as though she were tripping over herself to interact with Whisper. "That is reminding me of my question for you. I hearing from friends in Niceties that you are teaching piano. My father is learning piano, but his old teacher moved. Are you taking more students?"

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper was surprised Asta did ask them to teach her that skill. She was after all managing a garden. How could someone like that ask them for any help? It was really bizarre and again, felt almost forced. Except Asta was excited at the prospect which sent very very very confusing signals to the overwhelmed socially fox. They just thought they were not as emotional and yet, now they did show excitement with such little thing.

Taking a moment to process Jill's request Whisper pondered if they were a right pick. Indeed, they were already teaching music. They were also a bit confident about that. But it was with beasts they did know. Were sure of. Asta's father could be anyone really and that was scary prospect. Yet it was Asta asking, Whisper didn't dare say no, trying to preserve that little connection and trust they were not forming. "I... I c-can teach y-your father. I-I don't t-take much, only I a-ask f-for it t-to be-be at my p-place." They finally spoke hoping the one plea of theirs won't cause any issues.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Oh thank you, Whisper!" Asta slung an arm about the little fox, pulling them in for a brief side hug as they walked. "He would be okay with going to your place, I thinking. It is not far from our house."

As if to demonstrate this, they turned the corner and Asta pointed at one of the Brownstone condos, the only one whose front steps were festooned with pots of plants. "See? There is our house."

She led the way up the steps and pulled a key from her satchel to unlock the door. Unceremoniously kicking off her boots, she glanced down at the other set of boots in the entryway and the sheathed sword hanging upon the coat rack. "Oh. Looking like my father is home. I thinking he would still be at work." Holding out her paw for Whisper to take, she smiled. "Follow me, I'll show you my room, then we can find Caden."

Leading the fox down the hallway, Asta opened the door into the master bedroom. It was a large room, decorated eclectically with dried herbs, flowers, feathers, and potted plants. Several small paintings of the Varangian countryside hung on the wall, and on her dresser sat a framed portrait sketch of a young male and female marten. Articles of clothing were strewn on the bed, and a quiver of partially fletched arrows lay atop the clothes. Asta quickly shoved the clothes and arrows to the side to clear a spot on the bed.

"Um, you can sit here, if you'd like." She rubbed the back of her neck, standing awkwardly for a moment. "Ja, this is my room. Oh!" The jill opened a drawer in the dresser and pulled out a stack of sheet music. She plopped on the bed beside Whisper and showed them the music.

"This is some music my father writing. Not Caden, my other father, Einar." She pointed to the portrait. "I thinking I told you about him at the Opera."

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper let out a squeak as Asta gave them a side hug. They were so not used to a non-family member giving them one, safe for maybe one giant red panda. They couldn't however deny that those felt nice and while anxiety inducing, they just felt nice. Seeing the row of very similar Condos, safe for the one that had a front covered in greenery, Whisper did stare maybe a bit at the flowers in the pots. They liked wild, field flowers and chrysanthemums were their favourite so spotting those made them smile a bit.

Entering the house with Asta, Whisper with shy curiosity looked around and followed them, the news that the father was home was a bit stressful. However it was the next words that actually brought fear to the little fox. Caden. Asta did tell Whisper before that he was her father. Whisper just pushed out of her memory the exact events at the Opera so much that they forgot that connection.

Still following her, Whisper started panting from anxiety rising. Caden sure as it turned out wasn't anyone bad, yet... the memory of him offering help, then drawing the blade, it mortified Whisper who suddenly was pale, despite the red fur.

Being allowed into Asta's room, slightly soothed the fox crashing mind. It was erratic, haphazard and it had a bit of everything everywhere. Whisper could feel at home in a place like that, the chaos was organised and homely, not much unlike the one in their place. sitting beside Asta on a bed further made them slightly more at ease, especially as the topic was shifted to the music again. Albeit this time mentioning Asta's other father.

They let out the held breath, it was slightly painful because how long it was held. Still, Whisper nodded. "Y-you did... You s-said he was a b-b-bard too." They followed the pawfinger to look at the photo. "S-so... th-those are y-your b-b-blood pa-parents? They l-look nice..." Whisper mused, though they really felt like walking on caltrops with each sentence, so instead they focused on the music sheets. "Ooh, your f-father ha-had t-talent." The fox added before quietly humming out the notes, gently tapping their paws on their lap.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"He did." Asta nodded as she sat beside Whisper, looking over the notes. She listened to the fox hum her father's music and enjoyed how the melody sounded with the timbre of their voice. "I am working to translate some of his songs to Vulpinsulan. It is hard, though. The sounds of the languages and words can be different, and some meanings just not coming through."

Standing again, she went to her armoire and pulled two casual dresses off hangers, one an emerald green, the other light purple. She held them out in front of her. "Which one you thinking I should wear?"

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper nodded as they heard what Asta was working on, still gently humming the song. They were not one for writing songs, not they knew many languages, but for sure they were aware of the problems that came with translation and how it could screw up everything.

They were frankly speaking getting more and more relaxed, Asta really did seem causal with them. The abruptness at which however they changed the topic was really off-putting and suddenly brought some of the stress back. Whisper questioned themselves if their humming was irring Asta to the point she asked them such unrelated question to just shut them up.

However, while Whisper fashion sense was definitely warped by their own perception of their body, they still liked to look well. For a reason their closet and wardrobe and drawers had many varied outfits that worked on their posture. Also the fact they could mask as much of the body helped a lot. They did have an opinion on fashion... just one biased here.

"G-green... I t-think it w-wi-will b-be better." Whisper said, totally just wanting to see Asta wearing their favourite colour.

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

"Green it is, then." Asta beamed at her friend. She turned away from Whisper and unceremoniously stripped off her damp dress to her undergarments. At that moment, there was a knock on the doorframe of the open door. Caden appeared from the hallway, his head peering around the frame and into the room.

"Asta, I heard you come home and--" he stopped, eyes widening behind his glasses before he quickly coughed and stepped back from the door and looked away. "Oh, sorry. I didn't realize you had company. Should I close the door, or...?"

Asta laughed. She pulled on the green dress, turning around once more. "It's okay. I was only getting changed. Caden this is--"

"Whisper." Caden stepped back into the doorway and waved to the fox. "Yes, we met at the Opera before things went bad. How are you recovering from it all?"

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

When Asta with no ounce of shame dropped her outfit, Whisper, in shock, couldn't help but stare. True that the Jill literally saw them naked not so long ago, but Whisper knew their body was that of a mismatched child mid-puberty. In other words, a big shame to her, but nothing interesting to others. Asta on the other paw was tall, graceful and with proportional slim build. The fox blushed in awkwardness as they pulled the legs up and hugged them, surrounding themselves with their tail.

And then Caden came in and Whisper was sure they were going to die on a spot. Their heart almost exploded from sudden pang of anxiety. Not just because his presence was related to very fresh and recent trauma. More because in Whisper's mind, Caden just stepped in on them watching how their daughter disrobes.

At least he didn't seem mad, but with very confusing messages from Opera, Whisper was ready to believe he could pull a sword at any point at her, no matter the kind facade. At the attempt of interaction with Whisper, they only had managed something between a sob and a whine and spoke with cracking voice. "H-hi C-C-Ca-Caden... I-I-It's b-be-been h-ha-ha-hard."

 

[Asta Dalgaard]

Asta plopped herself back on the bed beside Whisper and twisted so her back was turned towards the fox. "Could you buttoning up the back, please?"

Leaning against the doorframe, Caden nodded in sympathy at Whisper. "Aye, it's been a difficult recovery for many of us. It's good to see you up and about. I didn't realize you and Asta knew each other, though."

"We meeting backstage at the Opera," Asta explained. "Whisper is a musician and composer."

"What do you play?" Caden asked, lifting a paw to pull the collar of his shirt away from the healing burn scar on his neck.

 

[Marie "Whisper" Deftclaw]

Whisper struggled with keeping her thoughts in any organised manner. They were extremely overwhelmed and wanted to just stop existing. Presence of Caden was suffocating, Whisper was pretty sure that at any second he will just smite them down should they continue doing anything with Asta.

Asta, of course, didn't care and leisurely ask for help with buttoning the dress. Whisper broke at this point. The only solution their failing psyche could muster was to choose stability. Even if it was the most bleak one, certainty was better than horrid attempts at doing whatever it was regular beasts did in this scenario.

Moving shaky paws to button the dress, Whisper only tried not to touch Asta. They failed almost immediately, as their trembles made them brush Asta's fur with each button. But it didn't matter. Whisper knew they would suffer anyways so they just continued and answered while tears freely flowed from their eyes.

"I... P-piano, vio-violin, f-f-flute, drum-ms, br-brass... a-anything re-really." Whisper had almost whispered.