Private Barracks/Imperial Condos Comrade in Harms

[Daniil Ryalor]

Daniil's expression turned to shame as Caden inquired after his chosen vocation, and he looked down at his paws, clasped in his lap. "It..." He swallowed, clearing his throat before admitting, "It was for my siblings. After my mother died, and most of House Ryalor was killed that night by unknown assailants, everyone in our family was terrified. We didn't know who was responsible, we didn't know if the threat would follow us across the sea to Eastisle. I..." He swallowed before admitting, "I was worried that whoever killed our mother would come kill us too. So, I learned how to defend myself and those around me. At first it was just to protect myself and my siblings, but once my cousins started to come along, I stepped up and protected them as well. Not very well, I'm afraid." He grimaced, his mind going back to numerous close calls. "Since they've all grown up, I've been at loose ends to find a purpose for myself. Any one of them could best me now, so there is no purpose in me guarding them. I could go protect my sister Mileya, I suppose, but she resents being watched over that way, and would turn it into watching over me instead. So, continuing to use my skills in the Guard makes the most sense. If I can't protect my family, I can at least help to protect the Imperium."

 

[Caden S. Freemont]

Caden felt like disappearing in that moment as Daniil spoke. Alwyn had not been exaggerating when he describe how much Vaelora's death had impacted the path of Daniil's life. Memories and impressions long buried of that chaotic, violent night surfaced, and Caden held back a shudder as he thought of the terror the young fox must have experienced. For him, he had been burning with vengeful rage and had a clear purpose. He could still readily recall the heady, empowering thrill of the experience despite his guilt and shame. For a fox kit in House Ryalor, it must have been something akin to a nightmare, disempowering and stripping away any sense of safety or security.

"They all grew up, did they not?" Caden said softly, gently. "I would say you succeeded. You took a tragedy and built yourself a life from it, seeking to help others because of your pain. Now perhaps, as you said, you can shift your purpose. And maybe, Daniil, you'll find more of yourself in the process."

He looked out the window, gaze unfocused as his mind's eye went elsewhere, to his own story and memories. "At some point we all have to live for ourselves a bit. We're allowed seek out the happiness that's eluded us because we have either been running from ourselves, from some failure or mistake, or we've been just trying to live for others to feel like we have some clear purpose for existing." Caden inhaled and exhaled slowly, shaking his head as he came back to the present and looked at the painting on the table.

"Einar helped me with coming to that understanding. Sometimes it just takes the right beast in your life to show you the way to feeling like you can finally stop and rest and be content with yourself."

 

[Daniil Ryalor]

Daniil's eyes started to shine with tears as he listened to Caden's reflections and affirmations. The gentleness of Asta's lute in the background only added to the moment, providing an accompaniment to catharsis. "I've spent so long trying to live for everyone else," he admitted, leaning forward slightly despite the pain. "I... I don't know how to simply be myself anymore. I..." He hesitated, sniffling, before admitting, "I used to like poetry. Reading it, but writing it too. My mother would read poetry to me as I fell asleep. Maybe... Maybe it's time I try it again... if I can find inspiration in something... or someone."

 

[Caden S. Freemont]

"That sounds like a beautiful place to start." Caden smiled, unable to hide his genuine affection for the fox. He set his plate down and stood. "If you like poetry, I have a book you might enjoy."

Walking to the book case beside the piano, he searched the shelves. "My parents were in an arranged marriage. My mother wasn't keen on the idea at first, thinking my father would try to overshadow her and strike down her ambitions. Gordon, however, won her over by being fully supportive of her political aspirations, and by being a very charismatic, charming suitor." He tapped at his chin and pulled a worn book from the shelf.

Caden turned to Daniil and pawed the book to him. The cover was non-descript, simply reading A Collection of Poems.

"I recently came back into possession of several artifacts from my mother's estate. Not much is left, but I found this to be a window into what was perhaps a simpler, happier time in her life. It looks as though it was a courting gift from Gordon early on in their relationship."

Indeed, when Daniil opened the front cover, there was a paw-written note within.

Dearest Nuori,

I know you prefer Naval histories and battle logistics, but I thought you might enjoy this collection by various authors for some lighter nighttime reading. At the very least, even if you do not enjoy it, perhaps it will bore you into a restful slumber.

With interest,
G.F.

Caden rubbed the back of his neck, feeling suddenly quite shy. "I thought there was some very nice imagery in several of the works. There was one--it's about a long lost love--that definitely got me shedding some tears. If you'd care to borrow it, for some inspiration, I'd be happy to lend it to you."

 

[Daniil Ryalor]

Daniil stood to follow Caden, wincing with some pain, and accompanied him to the bookshelf. He carefully accepted the volume, gingerly opening it and reading over the inscription, eyes widening at the loving sentiment expressed therein. Reverently he turned through the pages, his eyes scanning over lines of poetry before he found the one in question, or at least one of a similar sentiment.

"The schooner Hope washed 'pon the shore of the sea of Melancholy," he read out loud, the timber of his voice proving smooth and expressive, perfect for carrying the sentiment of the words, "no sign therein of whom she bore, a bride intended to be. And I alone, a groom no more, pushed back out to the sea; my forlorn Hope, by sail and oar, to seek my Amelie. Whe'er Primary or Humidor, e'er wandering shall I be, 'til find my bride on stranger tides, my Amelie and me." He blinked back tears, closing the book. "Thank you," he whispered, his voice a touch hoarse. "I shall safekeep it with my life, 'til it be returned to you."

 

[Caden S. Freemont]

Caden let out a wistful sigh. "You're welcome. That one gets me every time, and the way you read it--" He put his paw to his chest. "You really captured the emotion, I think."

They stood together by the shelf, close enough that Caden could feel some of the warmth from the todd's body. He glanced down, shifting his gaze from the todd's so as to not appear overly intense, and the dagger caught his eye once more. A twisting sensation turned his stomach. What was he doing? There was no way this could end without heartbreak, more than he had already caused for Daniil in his lifetime. What if he told him the truth of that night and his part in it? No, Alwyn had warned him against that, warned him of what that information might do to his cousin. And Caden had sworn to keep the secret from Daniil. It would be better that way, of course, if he simply never found out.

Caden found himself reaching up to lay a paw on Daniil's shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. He smiled at the todd. "I'm glad the Fates put me in the Slups that day so that I could make sure the world didn't lose a beast such as you, Daniil."

 

[Daniil Ryalor]

Daniil felt his heart thumping in his chest as Caden put a paw upon his shoulder. His nerves felt alight with anticipation, a nervous energy racing through his body. 'Gates, he could almost smell the blueberry and tea on Caden's breath standing this close to him, but rather than finding it off putting, it was intoxicating to Daniil. Don't look at his lips, look at his eyes, don't look at his lips... The sustained eye contact was too much for him, and he glanced down, right to where he'd promised himself he wouldn't look. His whole mind went blank, and he struggled to dredge himself back, to recall what Caden had just said. "I, ah..." He swallowed before stating, his throat a bit dry, "I'm glad as well. I'm happy it gave me this opportunity to get to know you better, and to meet your lovely family."

 

[Caden S. Freemont]

Caden hadn't noticed that Asta's playing had stopped. He caught movement from the edge of his vision and saw her standing in the doorway, paw over her mouth to hide a gleeful smile. She stepped into the room. Caden cleared his throat and gave Daniil a rueful look that could have been characterized as roguish by some. He dropped his paw and took half a step back from the todd.

"Music," Asta said by way of explanation for her intrusion, pointing to the shelf behind the pair.

"Oh, right, of course." Caden made room for her to access the shelf.

"Not flirting, hm?" She eyed her adoptive father with a knowing quirk of her brow as she pulled out a folder of loose sheet music.

Caden folded his arms over his chest and matched her expression. "Fine, maybe some."

Asta opened the folder and showed the contents to Daniil. "You know any? I play for you."

 

[Daniil Ryalor]

Daniil looked over the sheet music, his brow furrowed as he examined the titles. He paused on a piece, smiling as he recognized the initial notes. "This was one my sister used to play for me, when..." His throat tightened as he manged to get out, "when I was feeling sad. I suppose it's probably my favorite."

(I'm imagining it as similar to Lágrima by Francisco Tárrega)