Stoatorian Guard Open Barracks/Imperial Condos Hurrah For The Stoaties!

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

Never mind the drizzle over Bouillabaisse, in the mind of one of its newest intended citizens it was a jolly sunny afternoon. The time had come for a fresh start, a chance to prove one’s mettle. Dressed as smartly and practically as he could manage with his limited wardrobe, a dress shirt (with only a few holes in) above tight leggings, the lanky hare marched up to what he hoped was the right office to approach at the Ministry of War. He ignored the distant cursing of beggars he had accidentally trampled in his hurry to get here before the day had worn on too long and rapped at the door.

“I say, chaps! Won’t you let a fellow in? Reporting for duty, sahs! Never seen a finer recruit than me, you’ll hardly believe your peepers, wot wot! Hallooooo?”​

 

[Eirene Liu]

The door creaked open, and a rather bemused sable ferret in the uniform of the Stoatorian Guard, helmet tucked under one arm and halberd slung across her back, looked out on the hare. "Well, dis is new," she remarked, her voice colored by a Hanshiman accent. "I heared dat de woodlanders live here now, but you are de first I see come to serve de Imperium." She gave a small, nonchalant shrug. "Come on in," she invited, stepping back a pace. "I'm sure dere is a job for you we can find."

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

Delivering a salute to his forehead with such voracity he near concussed himself, Dorian straightened up before the ferret.

"Capital, marm! I look forward to showing just how much we woodlanders are worth our salt! Much, much obliged."

He strode in with only a slight trip over his footpaws, beaming and full of curiosity.

 

[Dusk Rainblade]

Eirene shook her head at the hare's enthusiasm, following after him. There was an unattended desk in the center of the room, to which the ferret circled, looking about. "Normally dere is a beast here," she noted, "but I tink she goed for cough-ee. Is okay, I will help." She started to look through the forms filed in neat cubbies behind the desk, trying to find the right one. "What job you come for?" She inquired as she searched. "Army, navy, guard, marines?"

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

When his eyes had finished darting about the room, Dorian focused his attention quickly upon the desk. He was customarily a hare of action but there was something about the neatness of organisation that he found extremely satisfying. That, and he really wanted to know what was in every drawer and box. An inkwell was as wonderful a surprise as any.

'Cough-ee'! Oh, he absolutely had to try that sometime. The harbour was brimming with things that were new to him.

"Thank you from the very bottom of my heart, marm. Wherever I am most needed, haha! Guard sounds splendid although dashing about aboard a ship would also be jolly super! I don't suppose there's some sort of healthy rotation?"

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene pulled out a form, then put it back, apparently finding it not to be the correct one. "Well," she mused, "I hear dat de marines serve on bot' ship and land. Dey go on landing parties, tings like dat. Maybe dat is best of bot' worlds. I know dere is shore time still for navy beasts, and marines too. My daughter is in de navy now, and when de ship returns - soon, I hope - she can visit for a while." She found the form she'd been looking for, and passed it across the desk. "Dere we go," she remarked. "Dere is a checkbox for which branch you apply. I tink you can check more dan one if you want de Ministry to decide." She lowered her voice before adding, "I tink as well dat serving in de Guard while in Harbor, and elsewhere while not, is also okay. When I last lived in de Harbor, dat was acceptable."

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

"Spiffing, wot wot!"

Dorian scraped the form swiftly toward him. He reached for the nearest quill and dipped it hastily in its inkwell, accidentally dribbling a few spots across the desk. The clumsy hare hadn't yet noticed, his attention fixed upon the checklist.

"Hmm. Hmmmmm. Oh, yes, that'll do nicely. H-yere, and h-yere!"

A strike was put in both the Stoatorian Guard box and the Navy.

He then noticed the mess he had made. "Cripes, my apologies, marm! Allow me to clean it at once!" His paws floundered over the ink, marking his pads, before he remembered he had a kerchief in his pocket. One paw dug it out whilst the other cupped his own face and smeared ink on his cheek.

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene's eyes widened as the hare inadvertently made a mess, and seemed to be on the verge of making an even greater one. "Why don't we just leave it be," she suggested, trying to wave him off, "and let someone else deal wit' it later? Is probably best if we were never here."

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

At once Dorian saluted, getting another splotch of ink onto his forehead.

"Capital plan, marm. I can see why you're the hofficer, here! I shall await to hear of my position in due course. My humblest thanks for your assistance in this matter."

Unsure what to do with himself but unwilling to look timid and unrecruitable, he drew himself up further.

"I await your orders in the meantime, marm. Is there somewhere I should wait or anything I can do to assist you?"

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene considered for a moment what to do with this energetic hare. He wasn't accepted yet; Alwyn would have to have a look at him, and the navy had their own application process. Taking him out on the street seemed a recipe for disaster, and Eirene didn't want to take responsibility for what he might do to himself with a sharp object in paw, based on how he'd managed with the ink so far.

An idea popped into her head. "Tell you what," she suggested. "I need to polish de armor in de barracks. Why don't you help me, and you can tell me why you come to join? I am sure no is a normal story."

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

Only too keen to oblige, the besmudged hare fell into step beside her.

"Never fear! We shall have those armours shining like a crystal pool on a summer's day, wot wot! Indeed, my lady, I would not dare surmise that my story is anything special, but suffice to say it is a story indeed. My old home was a quiet and uneventful place, not enough excitement for an adventurer like myself. 'Dorian, young lad,' they said, 'you've got the hero stuff in you, that you have. You don't want to be dithering around here your whole life when there are good fights to be fought and progress to be made that could use a go-getter of your calibre. Get out there and see the world!'"

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene chuckled as she listened to the story, leading the way to the armory. "I know de feeling," she commented. "I grew up in a small town too. Was different for me; I had to come back to make sure was safe, and for duty to my ancestors. But," she added as they entered the room full of weapons on racks and sets of armor hanging from hooks, "I got to see de world and meet de love of my life, so I tink was wort it."

The ferret retrieved a box from a shelf and pulled out a feather duster, passing it to the hare. "Start by going and dusting all de armor off," she requested. "Pay attention to joints and crevices especially. If you see any rust, let me know. I'll come behind with a cloth for spot clean - and maybe you can tell me why you chose de Imperium of all places."

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

You might imagine hearts in the eyes of the hare as he took in Eirene's tale, tears pricking their corners. What a fable of bravery, honour, and epic romance!

Dorian accepted the duster as though he had been bestowed a magical sword of the realm.

"Let the dusting commence!"

He rushed for the first suit of armour, only just managing to stop himself from tripping into it before he began polishing away.

"You see, marm, I am very much of the opinion that the Imperium is a superb place for a fresh start. The Vulpinsulans get a very poor rep, if I may say so, where I come from and it simply isn't fair. I'd like to show them all how forward thinking and progressive it is here and be a part of this well-oiled machine!"

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene hesitated in brushing at a spot of rust that had started to develop in the armpit of one set of plate, taken by the hare's description of the Imperium as 'progressive'. This new regime certainly seemed to be that, though it still had its recalcitrant, conservative elements. "Is more progressive dan before," she allowed. "When I lived here tirty years ago, was not so good. My... partner and I get in trouble, bot' get fired from our jobs because we are togetter. Now it seems dat tings are more accepting. Not everyone, but is many beasts are friendly." She frowned at part of his characterization that had bothered her. "No is 'be part of machine' a bad ting? I always hear 'machine' used as a bad word."

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

"Do you know, that is a very good point, marm. A very good point indeed."

Dorian scratched his nose, the duster a little too close to it, causing him to sneeze.

"Oh, do excuse me. Yes, I always imagined 'machine' as a word of progress. Many parts working together to build a fabulous world of wonders, wot wot! But never mind my digression." He glanced over his shoulder at her as he moved on to dust a weapon rack. "That is bally awful what you had to go through, what little I know of it! I am so very glad things are better now. Why, honestly, I came here hoping I could be my fullest self, although I do not see that likely in my place of residence, haha! I intend to keep my peepers out for any more liberal establishments, if you don't mind my saying so, marm."

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene smiled at the hare's antics, finding herself surprisingly relaxed around the woodlander. It was surprisingly easy to talk to him; he seemed quite earnest and eager, good-natured as well. Eirene decided that she liked him, or at least what she'd seen so far.

She bit her lip as she considered his statement. "I hear dat dere is a place in de Slups, hidden," she remarked, focusing on clearing the rust gathering at the edge of a breastplate. "Is a place where many kinds of beast, not welcome elsewhere beasts, go to be togetter." She hesitated before stating, "My wife heared of it. She is private detective now. She wants we go see it some night; maybe you come too." She was largely guessing about the hare, but she'd been pretty spot on so far about spotting certain inclinations. Not that Caden and Daniil had done a very good job of hiding it, except seemingly from each other.

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

Almost entirely forgetting about his task for a moment, Dorian spun about to face her, beaming, his paws clasped together around the duster. He hadn’t clocked the nature of her relationship until now and was honoured to be trusted with the knowledge. In himself, he was not fully sure which way he leaned, but as far as he was concerned he was happy to keep his options as open as his clothing.

“That would be absolutely splendid! And a private detective she is, you say? How jolly exciting! I may very well take you up on the suggestion, marm, and all my wishes to your beloved.”​

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene chuckled at the hare's enthusiastic response. "Dank you," she replied, glancing over from her cleaning. "We dis autumn are married twenty-five years. I no know yet what we do to celebrate. Maybe we go see dat place togetter." She finished brushing away the rest of the rust, blowing once on the spot to make sure before moving on to the next piece. "You have anyone in your life dat is special?" she inquired conversationally.

 

[Dorian Bloomsbury Esq.]

Dorian was all cheer on hearing the length of their relationship and the possibilities of plans. On seeing Eirene continue to polish, he reminded himself to get on and dust the next piece along. With a bit too much enthusiasm, causing a piece to be dislodged. He managed to shift it back in place without causing his usual series of disasters and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hmm? Oh, not yet, not yet, haha. I'm a bit of a handful, truth be told. Humble beginnings, big dreams and all that. I'm hopeful that a rough and tumble place of excitement like Bully could be the place to find someone if any. Maybe once I'm settled on what I want to do, that'll be the ticket. If I may speak candidly, marm, I think I'm equally as interested signing up here as I may be in those Smudgies I've got wind of."

 

[Eirene Liu]

Eirene chuckled as the hare made mention of the Smudgies. "After my wife was fired from Misantropy for her being wit' me," she recalled, "she and de Minister goed to de Smudgies. I tink she was wanting to be one first, but her minister goed to Misantropy and no to Niceties. She always says in anotter life she is a Smudgie." She smiled as she glanced at Dorian. "I tink in Smudgies you do very well, but I am glad you are here too. We are happy having you. And," she added, lowering her voice, "maybe you meet someone. Can happen unexpectedly to any beast. You tell me, but I tink I see a romance in de Guard. You keep your eyes open and tell me if you see it too, okay?"